Holding Hands

*Warning: Be prepared for some pretty blunt honesty. A lot of it.*

I love to learn. A very good way to learn is through questions. I do not, however, adhere to the whole "The only stupid question is the unasked question." There are plenty of stupid questions out there. If you want to know one, just ask. If I do not understand what someone is saying (in English or Spanish, mind you) I do not pretend like I know. I let them know that I do not understand. You can ask anyone here and they will tell you the phrase I say the most is "Yo no comprendo." And yes, I just had to look up "comprendo" in the dictionary because spell check does not correct my Spanish misspellings.
Now down to the blunt honesty, I promised. In my relationship with the Lord, if I do not understand something I ask Him. Obviously I do not think it is wrong to ask questions of God. I want to know Him. You get to know a person through asking questions and listening to what they have to say about themselves. The same is true of my Savior. I want to know His mind. And well, that just does not come naturally to me. So, again when I do not know something, I simply ask. James tells us, "If any man lacks wisdom (umm...that would be ME!) let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally...."
So over the years, I have asked many questions of God. "Why are you allowing this to happen?" "Would you please show me how you are going to work? Just a glimpse?" "Why didn't this relationship work out the way I hoped it would?" "What exactly is it that You want me to do?" "Why did you place this before me?"
Well, as He always does, God answers in His perfect time. Of course, I do not know what time it is until it happens. Well one of those times has come. I love getting answers! It happened one day as I was riding in a truck with people packed in like (well, I was going to say, "like Mexicans" but they are Mexicans, so the comparison falls apart). Anyways, there were lots of people in a truck that just seemed to be getting smaller. I happened to be one of those dear souls. I loved it! It was in that moment that I realized I had the answer to so many of the questions I had asked. "My dear, this is why I allowed the things in your life, why I did not give you a job or a boyfriend or a job when you asked for them, why I placed you in certain places when I did, why I gave you the desires you have, why you have an independent spirit (oh how many times I have wished I did not have that one!)....I, my dear, I have done all this to bring you to this moment. Here and now." I had nothing but reverence and wonder for the One who gave me this abundant life.
As a friend of mine so wonderfully put it in song...

"I finally recognized the hand that was holding mine."

And in that moment there were no questions.